How Does Sex Drive Change as You Age?
It’s no secret that as you age, sex can start to look different from how it did when you were younger. This is a combination of many different factors, from the shifting mental, emotional, and social influences on your life to physical and chemical changes in your body. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing– it’s natural for your sex drive to change and slow down as you get older, and you can still have a healthy sex life no matter your age. It’s good to know what changes to expect, however, and that if you’re struggling with changes to your sex drive as you age, there are routes you can take to help combat the less-than-enjoyable effects. Here’s a quick breakdown of what the evolution of an adult’s sex drive typically looks like. Remember, everyone is different, so these are not hard and fast milestones so much as generalizations.
20s and 30s
You might assume that both men and women have their highest libidos around the same age, but that’s surprisingly not true! In men, testosterone is high in the 20s, and sex drive is usually high along with it.
For women, libido is a little lower during the 20s but tends to go up in the 30s. Sex drive is a very complicated subject, and scientists haven’t conclusively proven why this happens, but it’s generally assumed that there’s a correlation between the increase of sex drive and the decrease in fertility that happens in the late 20s to 30s. High fertility in your 20s might lead to an evolutionary instinct to be more selective about sex.
Pregnancy
Most women who have children do so sometime in their 20s and 30s, and this has some serious effects of sex drive, not just during the pregnancy, but afterwards as well. It’s common to experience a boost in libido during the second trimester and be disinterested in sex at other times, but this isn’t the case for everyone. Some women experience an unusually high sex drive during pregnancy, or an unusually low one, or they might be anxious about whether it’s safe (the answer is typically yes, but double check with your doctor if you’re nervous). The stress of raising children can also lead to a decrease in sex drive after the baby arrives.
40s
Around the age of 35, testosterone levels in men start to drop, which can cause a decrease in sex drive as well. These changing hormone levels continue into the 40s, and the decrease might be fairly gradual for some men or faster for others.
Women, on the other hand, tend to have fairly high sex drives and active sex lives in their 40s. Some studies indicate that women around this age are more likely to have sex more often and earlier on in a relationship, as well as having more intense fantasies.
50s
For men, sex drive around this age is usually significantly lower than it was earlier in life, although there’s no reason for this to get in the way of a healthy sex life. Erectile dysfunction does become more common in men as they get older, but this actually has less to do with age and more to do with other health problems that become common with age, like obesity, heart disease, diabetes, and high cholesterol. Medications for these conditions and others can also lead to erectile dysfunction, and you should discuss it with your doctor if it’s becoming a problem.
For women, lowered stress levels from environmental factors like the kids moving out or less worry around getting pregnant might lead to an increased interest in sex, but the onset of menopause can throw a bit of a wrench in the works with hormonoal changes leading to things like vaginal dryness, lowered libido, and mood changes or sleep problems. These are also things you should discuss with your doctor.
What Can I Do?
If you’re struggling with the effects of aging on your sex life, hormone replacement therapy might be a great option for you! At Renewed Vitality, our bioidentical hormones are more efficient and have less adverse effects than synthetic hormones, and giving yourself a boost of testosterone or estrogen as needed can help to get you feeling more normal and get your sex life back on track. If you’re interested in this treatment, please contact us here to learn more!
Mental wellness and sex are a lot more closely connected than they might seem at first glance. Although they’re incredibly different from person to person, everyone needs to have balance between these two factors. Whether they engage in intimacy with one person, multiple people, or individually, good mental health is tied to a healthy sex life, and a healthy sex life is tied to good mental health. With age, it can be common for sex drive to decrease, which can have unexpected results on a person’s mental wellbeing, so making an effort to keep your sex life active later in life can be very helpful! Here are some of the benefits of a healthy sex life on your mental wellness.
Relationship Benefits
If you’re in a relationship, keeping up with your sex life can do a lot of good things for you and your partner. Physical intimacy encourages communication and bonding between partners, boosts self esteem and self image, and can help lower relational anxiety, or anxiousness around relating to or bonding with other people. Overall, it helps to bring you closer together and make your relationship stronger and happier, which is never a bad thing!
Lowered Stress
Sex offers all the same benefits of exercise, so it has the added side bonus of lowering your stress levels by releasing your body’s feel-good hormones, endorphins and oxytocin. Overall they help you to feel more relaxed and stave off feelings of anxiety and depression.
Improved Mood
Just like your daily mental health walk helps you to feel happier, so does sex! The same hormones that are associated with lowered stress levels, endorphins and oxytocin, as well as serotonin, can help you to feel happier and put some more pep in your step throughout the day.
Better Sleep
A healthy and active sex life will be a big help to your sleep patterns. The brain chemicals released during sex help you to feel relaxed and sleepy, which can help you get a better night’s shut-eye. Poor sleep can be extremely detrimental to your mental health, even just one night and especially if it becomes a chronic problem, so by helping you to sleep better, sex can also better equip you to handle your mental wellness.
Between changes in your sex drive as you age, increased stress, and a busy lifestyle, keeping your sex life active and healthy can start to feel like an afterthought, but the benefits you can get from making it a priority in your life are worth the effort it takes to make time for it. Whether you’re in a committed or casual relationship or you’re single, you can still enjoy all the mental health benefits, not to mention the physical health benefits!
If you’re struggling with sexual issues like low libido, speaking to a professional can make a huge difference. Renewed Vitality in Berks County is the area’s premier facility for hormone replacement therapy (HRT), which can be exceptionally helpful in terms of improving your sex life, especially as you age. We have both male and female patients, and we offer safe, effective treatments to help with hormone imbalances and restore your quality of life. Contact us to learn more about what this treatment can do for you!
It’s Normal But Don’t Settle
As we get older our sex drives do have a tendency to diminish a little. This is nothing to be ashamed of, we’re not the young, energetic, sex driven 20-somethings we used to be.
It’s normal to see some drop in your sex drive, but if it seems like getting in the mood is just impossible now, it could be a sign of something more than just typical aging effects. You could be effected by a number of serious issues including hormone imbalance.
Below are some of the potential causes of lowered libido, and keep in mind a lot of these issues can be fixed or helped!
Interpersonal Issues
While your libido is a very personal thing, it can actually be connected to your interactions with others. If your partner is experiencing performance problems, this could cause your libido to fall. This is no fault of theirs or yours, so you should feel no shame. There are options to help with sexual performance, and it could be something you two could do together to help things out in the bedroom.
Another interpersonal issue could be the birth of a child. Child birth while obviously caused by sexual activity can unfortunately lead to less of it. This can be because of stress and worry, hormonal changes, a lack of sleep, postpartum blues, or body image issues. These are all temporary issues that you have the power to work through, but if you need to don’t ever feel ashamed of seeking help.
It’s important to remember that your libido is linked to so many factors in your life, and that it’s never something you should be ashamed of no matter what’s causing it to fall.
Medical Problems
illnesses both mental and physical can cause problems with your sex dive. Depression can destroy your drive, and anyone suffering knows that fighting depression is a very hard battle. Depression, while caused by a myriad of things, could be caused by a hormone imbalance. Fixing the root cause is the best way to get every aspect of your life back, including your sex life.
Something physical that can cause sexual drive drops are thyroid issues. If your having hormonal issues with your thyroid you could experience weight gain, fatigue, depression, and a lowered sex drive. If your having issues with your libido the first place to look is the thyroid.
Low Testosterone
It may seem odd, but testosterone is actually important to the sex drives in both men and women, and low testosterone could cause a lowered sex drive. Women’s testosterone levels peak around the mid-20s and then steadily decline until menopause where they drop dramatically.
We don’t really think of testosterone as a feminine thing, but a having the right levels of testosterone in your body could make you feel like a 20-year-old all over again. Well, that or just make you feel much more like yourself.
Medications
Our medications are important to our health, but sometimes they can also be detrimental to it. It’s important that we know the interactions that our medications have with every aspect of our bodies, and that we know how we can counteract some of the undesirable effects.
For example, some antidepressants can actually lower your sex drive, which might be completely counter intuitive. And, blood pressure lowering drugs are almost certainly going to lower your libido. It’s important that your consult with your healthcare provider to find the best way to protect everything aspect of your emotional and physical well being.
Getting Back Your Desire
Your sex drive isn’t gone for good. There are number of treatment options available, and hormone treatment might be the best for you. With testosterone and/or estrogen treatment you could see results that will make you feel like you did pre-menopause.
You don’t have to settle for the “inevitable.”
Talk to your healthcare provider about options for getting your libido back!
